Dear parents of kids who ask hard questions about God and life:
I’m in your corner.
With my Kevlar vest.
Because the questions keep coming and just when I think the kids are out of ammo, arguments and controversy, they fire another round.
So, three sanity hooks for you today:
#1 Truth is absolute
Someone reminded me recently that the moment we criticize ideas we don’t understand – ideas we can’t control – we stop learning.
So, truth is absolute. You are not. You’re never absolutely right. You never understand absolutely perfectly. We all miss, and misinterpret, bits of God’s absolute truth. But we’re free to spend the rest of our lives discovering and enjoying as much of it as possible, all the while revelling in the mystery. Our kids are free to do the same.
#2 God is big
Everyone, at some point, must wrestle with the Almighty and decide if He’s for real, and if He’s for them or against them. Which can be scary for parents – because, what if our kids don’t have the big match temperament for that kind of fight? So fear has us trying to be the smartest person in the room. Except, we’re never the smartest person in the room. God is. And He’s far more capable than we are, to defend Himself.
Ours is not a tiny house-of-cards God who collapses under heavy questions. He’s at home in a boundless universe. Even if we are not, God is big enough to handle our kids’ anger or uncertainty.
#3 Grace is real
Maybe yesterday you parented your guts out all over your kids and it got ugly. Today, there’s new grace to mop the mess, Google that thing, apologize, or ask the next right question to help your kids towards the hope of Jesus.
There’s enough grace for your journey. There’s enough grace for your kids’ journeys too. God will take them places He’s not going to take you – because of you, and in spite of you. That’s really, actually, marvellous.
And when the barrage of questions keeps coming, Eric Hoffer might tell us this:
‘In times of profound change the learners inherit the earth, while the learned find themselves beautifully equipped to deal with a world that no longer exists.’
Inspire your kids to be brave and curious truth-seekers, by being one too. There’s no end to God’s wisdom, and no end to His generosity in sharing it.
. . .
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IMO the most important thing when dealing with kids is honesty – total honesty.
It is probably the most difficult too. Also kids watch our behaviour before they evaluate our words.
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