MARRIAGE: 14 Years. 2 Deep Thoughts.

We celebrated 14 years of marriage this week. Woo hoooo!

Deep Thought #1

My friend Tracey Williams texted me this:


Our wedding was freakin’ awesome. We planned to leave the reception at 10pm but our MC, Lachlan McIntosh, said There’s no way you guys can leave! Everyone’s having too much fun! Keep dancing! So we did.

It feels like yesterday a lifetime ago, and we can’t really remember who we were before we were each other’s.

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Tracey’s text made me think that the best friendships and relationships are timeless. They’ve got a kind of a-day-is-like-a-thousand-years and a-thousand-years-are-like-a-day thing going on.

And marriage feels like that more than any other human connection. Maybe because it’s the human connection that mirrors the God connection and God is inside time and outside time at the same time. He loves us timelessly and the covenant He made with us sets us free to spend the rest of our lives becoming what He has already declared us to be: His bride, without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Holy and without fault.

Deep Thought #2

My friend Sam Jooste texted me this –


Firstly, I know Sam totally meant greatest, not greasiest.

Secondly, I think she’s onto something profound.

In a love-starved world, you fill one gap and three more gawp wide. It can feel like you’ll never make a difference because there’s not enough of you to go around no matter how thinly you butter everyone’s toast.

So, within the confines of time, space and skin, one of the best things we can do is smear the love thick on our home slice – doing, in a way, for the one what we wish we could do for the many.

We can’t possibly love the world the way Jesus does. But He’s made our marriages echoes of His passion. What if, whenever anyone interacted with Jesus-loving married people, they were inspired to dig deeper into their potential because they heard God wooing them into, not necessarily marriage, but His best plans for their lives?

Against impossible odds, I think we should keep on doing all we can to make up the world’s love deficit.

But maybe, married people loving each other well – laying down their lives and their phones to make their other half feel whole; living with what’s-mine-is-yours-is-mine mindsets right down to the molecular level – maybe that’s the most powerful way we as grassroots citizens can speak truth to power and create culture from the ground up: consistently building the marriages that furnish the homes that make the heaven-on-earth havens for kids and out-of-towners and neighbours and down-and-outers.

Because just loving each other well pushes back the darkness a little more each day.

Just loving each other well changes the world.

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. . .

It’s the weekend! Have a good one!

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